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THANK YOU! for your interest in this subject matter and in my story. INTENT: #support for the #significant_others of #transsexuals and #transgender, to #advocate the necessity of being your authentic self, and to share information with others. By this, I hope to support your own journey, or add to your understanding of the journey of someone you know. ABOUT ME: A 45 year old #heterosexual woman, divorced w/children, I met Jack and fell in love. Six years into our relationship, he confided his secret desire--Jack wanted to be a woman. Before his disclosure, I had no reason to suspect his interest. It was a shocking surprise! It was the decade of the 1990's. Little information was available to help ME understand 'Why' and 'What next". Not only was Jack in transition, but by virtue of the circumstance, so was I. Guided by my heart, I began a journey of my own. Stepping out of my comfort zone I challenged my attitudes and belief systems, as well as, my own sexual orientation to help me decide 'Do I stay, or do I go"?

Disclaimer Note to Information and Video Links

Informational links and videos for chosen topics are provided based on conversations and experiences I shared with J and the challenges that we faced. If the information provided helps just one person who views, it was worth my posting it.

Not everyone's need, or experience, will be the same as ours was.

By your View and your click on a particular post, I am able to know which topics are of most interest to the reader and will make sure I include responses to your interest within my book.

Thank you for your support!

Friday, December 6, 2013

Seeking support - Physicians, counselors, and....the BDSM community? How might this fit in?


One might think why the BDSM community? Within many BDSM (bondage, dominance, sadomasochism) organizations, the term "safe, sane and consensual" guides the participants. I realize that the first thing that probably comes to your mind is the vision of leather-clad females cracking whips, at a male in shackles. While that can happen, it is a stereotype.

This community venue can provide a much larger stage for the #TG #TS. Open to diversity in thinking, role play and what is termed 'power exchange' The BDSM community may provide a safe place for some to act out what I will call "fantasies of self" in a non-judgmental/accepting and most importantly, a SAFE environment. "Safe" has the additional caveat of meaning "confidential" "private" and #consensual....

At organization events, it is possible to 'try the desired new self 'on for size'". Dress in costume (e.g., dress as M2F or F2M), role play in the gender one wants to be, practice voice and gestures/behaviors, and participate in what is called "power exchange". An explanation of power exchange, can be leaving the "male dominant" role for a few hours as one acts out, or explores, a "female submissive" role, or a female dressing as a male, and role playing, or "acting the part", among others who actively support through improvisation. At the same time, it is not encouraged to use BDSM play as "therapy" ... rather exploration of self.

I will state here that before engaging in this activity, research for an organization that supports 'safe, sane, and consensual role play'!! I believe that most groups require a participant to be 21 years of age or older. Review the organizations charter before joining, to see if they stress 'safe, sane, and consensual play', and if there are daytime/weekend group introductory meetings, attend one before you join or go to an evening event. Many can give you an on-line informational link before you attend any group intro meetings. You might check the Angelfire.com site on line which lists #BDSM, #fettish and #kink groups by State within the U.S. J and I found groups in San Francisco supportive to the #trans.

#roleplay #privacy #kink #BDSM #fettish #trans #safesaneconsensual #safe_sane_consensual #powerexchange #role_reversal #selfexploration #acceptance

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