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THANK YOU! for your interest in this subject matter and in my story. INTENT: #support for the #significant_others of #transsexuals and #transgender, to #advocate the necessity of being your authentic self, and to share information with others. By this, I hope to support your own journey, or add to your understanding of the journey of someone you know. ABOUT ME: A 45 year old #heterosexual woman, divorced w/children, I met Jack and fell in love. Six years into our relationship, he confided his secret desire--Jack wanted to be a woman. Before his disclosure, I had no reason to suspect his interest. It was a shocking surprise! It was the decade of the 1990's. Little information was available to help ME understand 'Why' and 'What next". Not only was Jack in transition, but by virtue of the circumstance, so was I. Guided by my heart, I began a journey of my own. Stepping out of my comfort zone I challenged my attitudes and belief systems, as well as, my own sexual orientation to help me decide 'Do I stay, or do I go"?

Disclaimer Note to Information and Video Links

Informational links and videos for chosen topics are provided based on conversations and experiences I shared with J and the challenges that we faced. If the information provided helps just one person who views, it was worth my posting it.

Not everyone's need, or experience, will be the same as ours was.

By your View and your click on a particular post, I am able to know which topics are of most interest to the reader and will make sure I include responses to your interest within my book.

Thank you for your support!

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

My boyfriend/husband said he wants to become a female. Does this mean he is gay?

This is a common assumption but not necessarily true. If you are a cisgender female in a het relationship, one of the first things that comes to mind is that your het man is telling you that he is actually gay and has a sexual interest in men -- and was never really interested in you. This is harsh assumption.

While this may be true, it is not always the case. A man who is heterosexual, may be just that...his interest in a sexual partner is a woman, and interest in a partnered relationship is with a woman. Just because the het male desires to be female, and has sex reassignment surgery and transitions to a female persona with female genitalia, doesn't mean that once he transitions to female, that there has been a change in mind set for sexual preference or interest. However, with the new physicality, he now a she, YOU will find yourself with a partner that is now physically female.

Your relationship sexually will take on a different dimension being considered a #lesbian relationship not only by change in his>her physicality, but viewed as such by society. It will be important for YOU to determine your needs and desires in the relationship, and to communicate those to your partner. While your partner may not be gay, she is now Lesbian. If you stay, knowing you are not lesbian or bisexual in any other situation, it may simply mean that YOU are bi-capable. For more information on what I feel it means to be "bicapable" see my post on this subject. #trans #bicapable #lesbian #heterosexual #sexuality #partners #change #adjustment #whatnext #socialstigma #socialview #perception #authenticself #M2F #F2M #dontmakeassumptions #relationship #cisgender #female #male

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